I'm not a great runner, and that's okay

I have a problem.

And I'm not sure how to word it, but I need to get it off my mind.  Maybe I'll never even publish this post.  We'll see.  Oops, looks like I did it.

My problem-

I have a very hard time accepting praise.  Accepting that I'm good at something.

On the flip side, I'm very good at nit picking everything I do.

Let's back this up (that's what she said).

(are you getting sick of twss?  Let's pretend you're not)

On my runWednesday, I had a speed workout.  I had 3 layers on, and I felt SLOW.  So, so, so slow.

I was getting down on myself.

"You're running so slow!"

"Out of breath at a 9:00 minute mile?  Good luck breaking 4 hours in the marathon."

"This is really sad."

"Why are you even running?"

Running is physical AND mental.  And some days it's easier than others.  Wednesday, it was ROUGH.  I wanted to quit a hundred times.  I kept telling myself to just go a little bit further, that I could. not. stop.

And then I had a bit of an epiphany.

Who CARES how fast I'm going?

Was I out of breath? YES.  Was I giving it my all?  YES.  Was I running hard?  YES.

So, why can't that be enough?

I was pushing myself and I never stopped trying.  Isn't that the point of training?  To push yourself?  To overcome hardships?  To kick butt?!

I need to stop comparing my "fast" runs to others'.  Just because my 5k pace is someone's marathon pace does not make me a bad runner.

When you run, you are a runner.  The end.  I need to let go of the concept that I suck because I can't run a 3 hour marathon.

I need to remember to just be the best runner that I can be.  And that quitting is what would make me a terrible runner.

End preach.


NO question today.  I just want to say that you are awesome :) Yes, you!